Tuesday, February 28, 2006

The Great Proposition

There are some folks out there who think alot like we do here at mikeandtimblog.blogspot.com. Whereas mikeandtim are a little short of "One million dollars!" (Use best Dr. Evil voice), we might use one million dollars for such a purpose as this....


Monday, February 27, 2006

pro-life, pro-choice...pro-alpaca?

andTim's post on abortion related situations and topics was quite strong. however, i can only handle such talks for a relatively short period of time before i must revert back to my immature ways. i will do so by offering up the following picture of a prize-winning alpaca which i think is damn funny. i mean come on, look at that thing.

his name is unknown, but if speculating, i would bet it is Matt.

Abortion and the 51st State

(This blog is not for the faint of heart.. and it is a rebuttal to the anglofille blog... anglofille.blogspot.com)

In Sarai's defense I go to her blog by choice, I read it by choice, and I continually read it even though it makes my blood boil, she didn't force me to read it.. but I am forced to respond.

And I quote...

"It’s painful to think about how backwards America is in so many respects. How did our country get hijacked by religious fanatics? How did we lose our moral compass? Women's health care options are restricted by the government. Men's health care options are not. We now have a health care system based upon principles of gender apartheid."

We lost our moral compass a while back. It was still largely intact through the 1950's, as much as liberals are trying to paint this time as the ultra-repression... of women, homosexuals, religion... whatever. The only group that can claim any sort of repression during this time were Black people. I don't use the term African-American because it is stupid. Most black people are no more African-American than I am French-American, or Brit-American, or Who-gives-a-damn-American. But that is another topic entirely....

Our country lost its moral compass around 1960. The 60's have been a popular scapegoat for the moral U-Turn in America, and justifiably so. But my generation (whatever that is X, Y, Z... MikeandTim were both born in 1979) has done nothing but welcome and exacerbate the extreme moral decline. Anyone who fails to recognize that the founding fathers were extremely pious, very very very far right wing (by modern standards), brilliant, and desired to have a nation firmly focused on the ethical standard put forth by the Bible is completely ridiculous. There is so much written about this subject that it does an injustice and a disservice to those who have written on the subject for me to dumb it down to the extent that I already have...

America in our modern time is on the verge of becoming nothing. We will split as a nation in the next 50-100 years. It will likely be right down the redstate/bluestate line. Why? Because we have no backbone. There is widespread apathy about everything except American Idol. No moral boundaries about anything. The Women's rights movements and Gay rights movements have shown heterosexual men to be thoughtless, careless barbarians whose appetites for living are only satisfied through recreation, food, and porn/sex. We are an emasculated generation that will lead to the complete collapse of America. Want proof? Look at these topics:

1- Foreign Trade and the Growing Deficit (we are sending our money elsewhere.. other people getting rich.. not us)
2- Abortion/Birth Rate (if women aren't having kids, our population shrinks, and we have no people to sustain a country)
3- Minimum Wage/Welfare/Social Security (bankrupts our nation- along with too much spending on defense. No one in our generation is willing to work at competitive wages with workers internationally, see point 1 from here)
4- Immigration (we may allow illegal immigration and it may make me mad, but they are taking jobs no one in our generation would work anyway, to say it again)
5- Education (the dumbing down of education creates high school and college graduates who are largely incapable of competing with similar graduates internationally... if living in Japan taught me anything, it taught me this. On the flipside, no one there is smarter, they just have higher standards for education in their society and people actually value intelligence there, not celebrate stupidity.. ex: The Simpsons, Homer and Jessica)

If America is to become successful it must turn to God, give up our arrogance and feelings of "entitlement" to white-collar jobs, stop celebrating pop culture icons as our gods, and make it actually impressive to go to and graduate from College.

Here is the official andTim stance on Abortion: it should be illegal except in extreme cases. As an example, one of my friends in high school had an older sister who was pregnant. The baby was in the 3rd trimester and had no brain development. None. In this case, I am not about to tell this woman that she and her husband cannot decide to abort the pregnancy. (If you feel like you could tell them this... you are wrong and in need of help.)

However, this comprises about .1%** MAYBE of all pregnancies. I understand that an allowance in one case gives rise to the allowance of other cases, but there are some cases where the state should not intervene. That is as pro-choice as I am willing to allow myself to become. If anyone out there wants to tell me that I am not allowed to speak on this topic because I am not a woman.. well us retarded barbarian heteros are 50% responsible in 99.9%** of the cases of pregnancy.

Note to those hedonistic idiots who go around impregnating women and spreading VD's: You will get yours, in this world or the next. (Yeah, I lifted that from Gladiator)

There have been around 46 million abortions* in the US since Roe V Wade. 46 million. Those people would comprise a state with a larger population than any in the US currently. For those of us in Texas... that is DOUBLE the population of Texas. The vast majority of these abortions were nothing like the case I described above. This is the 51st State. It is a state that would be larger than any other in our country, and we have killed them all. If anyone wants to tell me that these children would have been failures or leeches on the welfare system, or any of that crap... I will tear you a new one on the basis of your blatant racism and "I'm a victim!" attitude. Don't even start thinking about a rebuttal. There is no rebuttal to murder.

As for unwanted pregnancies.. take responsibility for your actions. That covers about 99.9%** of abortion cases. The other .1% of women who are pregnant due to rape: God has a plan for your child, and it is not their fault that they were brought into existence. Who knows how many amazing creative minds and great Americans (not a Hannity reference) we have lost to abortion. As far as the argument that rapists may be granted parental rights... that potential is directly attributable to the moral backslide in this country that has come about through liberal agendas being advanced via activist judges who are the puppets of activist groups. (read: Satan in the courtroom, the ACLU post-civil rights era) This is the ultimate case of "Have your cake and eat it too". (Which is perhaps the dumbest cliche' that continues to rear its ugly head)

You want liberalism? You want moral relativism? You want abortions? You want to call abortions a health care choice? Then you get rapists with parental rights. Take it and like it.

I have much more to say, but if I waste more time blogging than working, I am going to lose my cush white-collar job. (Although, I am wearing a blue shirt with a blue collar right now. Hmmm....)

For statistics and information: http://womensissues.about.com/cs/abortionstats/a/aaabortionstats.htm

* 46 million is an andTim computation. I went to public schools, but the average abortion per year in America is conservatively 1.4 million. Roe V Wade was decided in 1973, 33 years ago. Once again, 46 million is a conservative estimate.

It's no secret that I like using the 99.9% and .1% extremes. They may be slightly off, but I would be willing to bet that they are pretty close.

My personal e-mail: kidyork@yahoo.com

Friday, February 24, 2006

presidential trivia

not sure what made me want to post these, but its friday and a few people i work with were just comparing Bush to Clinton at the water cooler so it seemed to fit. you may not be as good of an American as you think. feel free to post your answers in the comments or email. good luck.

1 - What was the name of Bill Clinton's dog?
a - Jennifer
- Spot
c - Dr. Checks
- Buddy
- he didnt have a dog ya jackass, but his cat's name was "Socks"

2 - Identify the only three left handed presidents:
- Jefferson, Reagan, Youngster Bush
b - Daddy Bush, Youngster Bush, Hoover
c - Clinton, Daddy Bush, Truman
- Taft, Clinton, Hayes
e - Hayes wasnt a president, plus there havent been any lefties

3 - Name four people who arent presidents who are pictured on money. Here's a head start, two of them are Susan B. Anthony and Sacajaweaiaea, so you only have to name two.

4 - Essay: Describe the difference between the Revolutionary War and the way of 1812.
Ok, not really, dont do the essay or you are a dorkus.

5 - Which of the following were not presidents?
(hint: it could be all, a few, or none of them)
a - Juan Carlos Santamarialobos
b - Jimmy "Manifest Destiny" Polk
c - Franklin Pierce
d - Millard Fillmore
e - Zack Taylor

happy friday

Thursday, February 23, 2006

just swappin out a battery, right?

thats what i thought anyway. i have a 2002 chevy tahoe which has earned the nickname of "Bitch Ass 'Hoe" over the course of nearly 4 years of ownership. it first received aforementioned nickname after the engine failed, which i consider a good reason. in all honesty, i love the Bitch Ass, but this morning it reminded me of how it got its well deserved nickname.

last night my wife comes home and the truck was starting to malfunction. not while she was driving though, it was at least considerate enough to wait till she got home, which i cant complain about. it has been having some starting issues but it always turns over, and plus its frickin freezin mr. bigglesworth in the mornings where i live. cold enough that it would be beneficial to have insta-heater in the car (andTim should get to work on developing this) and it is acceptable for a truck to have a slight struggle before starting in these conditions. well, last night the battery went down. i was getting a few things out of the truck when the interior lights dimmed and the tone of the "hey jackass, your doors are open and your keys are still in the ignition" bell was headed to chinatown. DING DIng diooionng. pttttffftttp. so i figure, no big deal, i will run to walmart and grab a battery, let my wife take the other car to work, and i will install battery in the morning and take the truck. going to walmart anytime after 11pm is always a bit unstable to me for some reason, its just weird in there. so i proceed with the plan, buy the battery and figure its too darn late, cold, and dark to attempt this installation at midnight, so i go to bed.

i got up this morning and attempt to remove old battery. the toughest part of this operation is to find the right size socket, its not hard. well, i got the negative lead cable off with no problem (thats the black cable for you laypeoples) and then went to unscrew the positive cable. the side connector thingy was pretty corroded, but i got out a brush and some coke and cleaned it up a bit. as i turn the socket wrench to unscrew it, the whole connector pops off, including the threading and plastic from the old battery. this connector is about the diameter of a golf ball and it pulled off about an inch of battery plastic with it. is mike that strong to rip a hole in the battery? perhaps. but this time it was caused by such intense battery acid leakage that the plastic had melted to the battery cable and connector. not good. this prevents installation of new battery, which prevents truck from starting, which prevents getting to work. BITCH ASS 'HOE strikes again.

thank goodness my good friend James saves the day by taking the morning off so he can come over, cut battery cables with wire cutter, prep area, let me take his car to the AutoZone (that store is no good by the way, go to O'Reilly) and get the necessary parts. James helped me get it all handled and then we put the new battery in, of which i am very thankful. thanks buddy, you are bigtime. and so i finally go to work circa 11:45am, just in time to head to lunch with the crew. nice.

Wednesday, February 22, 2006


This is Hannah. She is today's featured blog reader.

Hannah Shanafelt
Age: 23
Occupation: Youth Minister/Musician
Interesting Fact: Obsessed with American Idol and the Office

*After a few requests to hear Hannah's music- I give you her myspace where you can hear two of her songs.


current book

i am currently reading "Sein Language" which as you can guess, is a book by the greatness of Jerry Seinfeld. this dude is so great at the identification of humorous occurances in everyday life. i think the book was written in 1994 and i am just now getting around to reading it, but i am somewhat refreshed by the 1994 seinfeld view of life and happenstance. the show was achieving great things at that time. i dont think it can be overstated how influential the show was and how it effected the humor in America. i am on chapter 3 and have found myself giggling frequently as i read. i think jerry seinfeld would be a fun person to hang out with / get to know.

what are you reading?

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

The Weather for February

(andTim assumes the local weather forecaster voice from the Weather Channel)

February will start off unseasonably warm, providing the opportunity for all varities of outdoor recreation and exercise. Highs will be in the upper 70's and low 80's, lows will be in the upper 50's at night. For those who are seeking to do a lot of running, swimming, or biking outside- this weather will give them the perfect opportunity to really focus on their training.

However, starting in mid-February winter will rear its ugly head here in Texas and we will have two straight weeks of rain, cold, and clouds. Highs in the upper 40's, lows into the upper 20's. This will serve to destroy all momentum you had built up in any sort of training, and relegate you to the couch reading a book or watching TV, because when it's 40 degrees and rainy outside, you don't want to do squat. This has been your February forecast....

Monday, February 20, 2006


i am not sure exactly what it is, but i love watching curling. it is my favorite winter olympic sport to watch. well, the snowboardcross was better, but curling is second best. maybe it is because our team is pretty good and has a chance to win, or maybe it is because i think it is the only olympic sport i may actually have a chance to compete in, but either way i love it.

i watched a lot of sports on tv this past weekend. watched some college basketball, watched the nba all star game, etc. the weather was bad enough that it didnt make a whole lot of sense to go out. my friend james and i did finish a workbench that i put in my garage. maybe i will take a picture of it so you can see what it looks like. pretty cool, james did most of the work. gotta have a sweet tool bench in the garage. the garage really is the main room of the house that the dude gets to mess with and have any way he wants it. well, almost any way. i do plan on installing a dart board in there soon. maybe build some shelves. ya know. i call piddling around in the garage "big bobbin" because my wife's grandfather named Big Bob always just chills in the garage all day and does stuff. he takes things apart and puts them back together.

wow, there goes the flying dutch squirrel walking by my workspace with much haste. i think i have mentioned him in past blogs? well, if not, he is this dude that walks faster than any other human does in the office. its like a power walk, and he is in such a hurry all the time (not sure why) that usually when he walks by with such haste he makes the papers flutter in my inbox. yeah, thats how fast he is.

Friday, February 17, 2006

Suggestion Box

We here at mikeandtimblog.blogspot.com are looking for your suggestions. There are big developments in the works for mikeandtimblog.blogspot.com... which may include...



I will type it again in case you missed it.


At this point we are willing to take your suggestions for what makes a good website. What kind of information you, our readers, are interested in reading/seeing aside from our brilliant, insightful cultural commentaries and heavy doses of seinfeldian humor. Yes, I just coined the term "seinfeldian". (2/17/06, 11:51 am CDT)

We promise this will be a website for the ages and something that you will often find yourself in withdrawal over if not having viewed the site within 30 minutes of previous visit. This is good for you, I promise.

This being said... it is confirmed that I will be going to see Cirque du Soleil in Houston next month. I once said that I would rather see ANY Cirque du Soleil than sit at the 50 yard line at the Super Bowl. Care to disagree? You are wrong!

Thursday, February 16, 2006

ten breakouts of 2006

the following are ten bands that are worth knowing before your friends do. this way you can scoreboard them with these names and your buddies can think you are sweet for knowing about them first...

i would be doing you a disservice if i didnt at least mention "The Knife" as worthy of listen as well. please email mikeandtim@gmail.com if you would like a sample tune from any of the listed bands. on with the originally posted 10...

1. The Subways (UK) - i like their tunes better than the comparable Arctic Monkeys (didnt make the list) and although they sound a little like the Vines, they are better and gooder.

2. Jeniferever (Sweden) - heard about this band from a fellow Ticket listener (thanks Chris) and they are similar to Sigur Ros, but i like them better. for some reason i havent gotten real into Sigur Ros, as i usually fall asleep before i get too far.

3. Hood (UK) - good tunes, sort of electronica, sort of not. been producing music since 1990, which is surprising once you listen to what they have been putting out. mood music, worth a listen.

4. Rocky Votolato (Texan living in Seattle, WA) - great singer songwriter. chilled out tunes.

5. Matt Pond PA (from Pennsylvania of course) - more chill music, as most of these bands are, but pretty creative. gets to be a little bit of a drag but the band name is unique so people will want to listen to it

6. The Selmanaires (Atlanta, GA) - pretty rockin, sound kinda like the Kinks from back in the day

7. Voxtrot (Austin, TX) - these guys are good. good sound rock band. similar sound to the Strokes

8. Black Rebel Motorcycle Club (San Francisco, CA) - rock. some songs sound like bob dylan

9. Midlake (Denton, TX) - formed at UNT, similar to the Matt Pond PA as mentioned above

10. Paul Duncan (Texan who now lives in Brooklyn, NY) - for those of you who like Iron & Wine

we welcome reader contributions of up and coming artists. please let us know who you like or if you would like to submit your music.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

first grade chaos

ever spent a day with 22 first graders?

if you havent, you should. kids this age are totally wild, energetic, and illogical. but they are so sweet and honest that it brings you back to the real world and puts things into perspective. yesterday i took half the day off to go party with my wife's first grade class and it was a great time. we went to the library and the kids were reading their favorite stories to me, we had recess where i got tackled by a dozen kids pulling on my arms and legs, and we had a good old fashioned party at the end of the day. remember the little bags that you decorate and the other kids put valentines in there that you get to open? so much fun. well, it reminded me of when i was in first grade, and a rather traumatic event that took place.

see, there was this girl that i had a massive crush on when i was 6 years old. her name was carrie and she was the hottest babe in the grade. the picture at right is a sketch of what i remember her looking like. as you can see, she was smokin hot. we were together a lot in school. in music class, when we went to recess, etc. i think we only hung out outside of school once or thrice, but things were lookin really good. so i figure, heck, i gotta give her a valentine on valentines day. now, every kid gives every other kid in class a valentine in first grade. boys even give other boys valentines (i verified this yesterday in my wife's class to be sure) and its not like they are goin brokeback on each other, its totally innocent. its just how it is. the valentine i gave carrie was a little better than the ones i gave everyone else. i dont remember details but i remember that much.

it came to be that time of the day where we were to open valentines and i remember the exact second in time when carrie opened the one that i gave her. i heard this "WHAT?? WHAT IS THIS?!?!" she walks over to where i was standing at the time, rips up the valentine in my face (literally) the whole while screaming "I CANT BELIEVE YOU GAVE ME A VALENTINE MIKE!! I CANT BELIEVE YOU! YOU ARE GROSS!" of course all the other kids turn to watch this episode and see this whole disaster unfold. she then wads up whatever ripped up portion of the valentine that hasnt fallen on the floor, slams it in the trash can which is right next to us, and then winds up and SLAPS ME as hard as one first grader can slap another. i wont lie, it hurt.

as you can imagine, this was an experience to remember. it really is a wonder that i ever gave another girl a valentine. i am pretty sure the only other time i have been slapped was by andTim's mom i think, but that was more to the head than the face. plus thats only because i did or said something that deserved it and she was doing me a favor.

any of you have simliar valentines heartbreak or story? lets hear them if you do.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

saint valentine

the actual st. valentine
patron saint of love, epileptics, and beekeepers
bet ya didnt know about the epileptics and beekeepers did ya?
Happy Valentine's Day

Monday, February 13, 2006

road trippin

anyone who drives the Corsicana Beatdown Highway from Houston to Dallas has probably seen the drive-in movie theater on the west side of Interstate 45*. many of us try to see what is currently playing as we drive by, although i recognize that this is a distraction to driving. still, it is so tough not to look. i glanced over last night and i happened to catch a glance of a woman's face, which took up the majority of the screen. it appeared that this woman was probably laying down and a split second later that was confirmed by a new camera angle, showing a love scene, which i found a little odd. the screen i am talking about is the only one that is easily visible from the highway, in fact it directly faces the highway. there was no visible nudity or anything wild, but is this not a stupid lawsuit waiting to happen? i can see it now, mom and dad driving with kids in the backseat look over to see 50' x 100' projected love scene and sue the drive in theater for negligence/damages caused by lovemaking that their children were forced to view from the backseat of their minivan. i bet you it happens, who wants to take me up on it?

just as noticeable, and right after you pass the drive in theater if travelling north, you see the "Christian Fraternity" of Ferris, TX on the left side of the road. from a distance it looks like a bunch of popsicle stick built gazebos and whatnot built in to the side of a hill. i neither embrace nor distance myself from that thing because i really have no idea what it is or its purpose. if anybody out there ever stops by to check it out, or already has, please let us know.

* mikeandtim have no idea why Interstate 45 is called such. It is not Interstate. It is only a highway within the state of Texas. what gives?

Friday, February 10, 2006

Project Runway

"..These are my confessions..."

Usher plays in the background... I am huge fan of the show Project Runway. It is guilty pleasure day for andTim here at mikeandtimblog.blogspot.com. I have frequently expressed my discontent about how male clothing in modern America largely sucks. That is why I go out of my way to wear plain t-shirts as much as possible. Anyway.. I like fashion design. I secretly would really enjoy being a fashion designer, and one of my goals for this year is to learn how to sew.

If you don't watch the show, it is fairly interesting.. granted you can get past the complete lack of masculinity in the show. (Not that I expected it to be a contest between the most heterosexual folks out there.) Anyway, the show is about up and coming fashion designers. It is creative and artistic, which makes it better than 90% of TV out there. Good work, Bravo. (Oh, and Heidi Klum is the host, and even though she is pregnant she is still really hot.)

Thursday, February 09, 2006

desktop background - winter

this is my current desktop background. i took the picture a while back, and for some reason i like it, mostly because of the color. i used to take more pictures but my camera broke. if you would like the full version of this picture or other similar winter shots, post a comment or email mikeandtim@gmail.com

song of the day: Sweet Dreams Melinda by Trey Anastasio (yeah andTim, i have some Anastasio tunage)

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Four Things

I refuse to use the term "Meme"

Four Jobs I've Had In My Life:
(these are the four I had for the longest duration)
1- Lifeguard (1995-1998)
2- Cafe Eccell- Waiter/Bartender (2000-2002)
3- Wedding Minister (2003-2004)
4- Heater Salesman (2005- present)

Four Movies I Could Watch Over and over and over and over....
1- Point Break
2- The Motorcycle Diaries
3- Lord of the Rings Trilogy
4- Ben Hur

Four Places I Have Lived:
1- The Woodlands, TX
2- College Station, TX
3- Mt. Ida, AR
4- Ueda/Norikura, Japan

Four TV Shows I Like:
1- The Office
2- Cribs
3- Trucks! (Spike TV Saturday Mornings)
4- n/a

Four Places I Have Been On Vacation:
1- Western Europe (U.K., Belgium, Holland, Germany, Czech Rep., Austria, Italy, Spain, France)
2- Hiroshima/Himeji/Kyoto
3- Grand Canyon/Vegas/San Francisco
4- Galveston

Four Websites I Visit Often:
1- Rollingstone.com
2- Foxnews.com
3- Sierratradingpost.com
4- Greenplastic.com

Four Favorite Foods:
1- Rice
2- Lasagna
3- Jambalaya
4- Steak

Four People I'm Tagging With This...
1- Jesse Jackson
2- Steve Irwin
3- The Pope
4- Jonny Greenwood

Meme times threeve

i was tagged by the mark and will complete the meme form. i have no idea what a meme is. and i have no idea what andTim did, but the fonts all over the mikeandtim seem to be on the juice. maybe it is just me but it looks like they have doubled in size.


Four Jobs I’ve Had in my Life:
YMCA basketball referee
Macaroni Grill Busboy
Contract Manager for Construction Company (current)

Four Movies I Could Watch Over and Over, and Have:
Point Break
Weekend at Bernie's
National Lampoon's Vacation (Wally World)

Four Places I Have Lived:
Dallas, TX
Lansing, MI
The Woodlands, TX
Philadelphia, PA
Baltimore, MD

Four TV Shows I Love to Watch:
The Office
Mad Money (Jim Cramer)
Antique Road Show

Four Places I Have Been on Vacation:
Grand Canyon, AZ
Bohemian Grove, CA
Munich, Germany
Zihuatanejo, Mexico

Four Websites I Visit Daily:
yahoo finance

Four Favorite Foods:
texas de brazil/fogo de chao
pei wei
glazed donut w/ black coffee
hot dogs at the ballpark
fryin up some fish you caught yourself

(i like food too much to only put four)

Four People I’m Tagging with This Meme:
Dr. Swiss of Limberger

Jim Boggia (met this guy at the duncan sheik concert, he was the opener)
any P1 that reads this, including Ticket employees (email
mikeandtim@gmail.com) if you dont want to post by comment

And if you DON’T have a website or blog or whatever… post your 4 Meme’s in the comments.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Gender Speculation Symposium - Odie

i think there is some speculation here. many of you will jump to the conclusion that Odie is a male dog. but is he though? in most commentaries, Odie is referred to as a "he". i would like to propose otherwise, with the following evidence:

a. Odie never eats very much, if at all. (i propose south beach diet and/or eating disorder, more common for females than males)
b. Odie never poops. (obviously must be female)
c. Odie never farts. (same as item b)
d. Although Odie salivates like none other, Odie maintains unbelievable cleanliness.
e. See that black spot on Odie's torso? thats a boob.

henceforth it is clear that Odie is in fact a female dog. case closed.

Monday, February 06, 2006

English: The Language


It may be difficult for some people to learn. But it is our national language.

Not Spanish.

Not other languages.

I must give Yao Ming props, as he has been sans translator for a while now. He has been "working" in the US for the last 3 years, and he has progressed.

This should not be the exception.

I lived in Japan, and I learned Japanese. Granted I took some classes in high school and college, but they were no more than introductory classes. However, after a year I required very little help- and then it was only with more complicated procedures (banking, government documents, etc).

Now, I am not absolutely exceptional at anything except for taste in music. I hate the lack of English learning that goes on out there. Learn or move.

I also hate the native tongue pronunciation of names and places on the news. Gu-chi-eh-rrrezzz? Not in English buddy. Gooti- ehrz. (Gutierrez) Do I run around saying "Kaw-raw-Oh-kay" or "Kaw-raw-tay"? No! I live in America. In America we speak English, we intentionally pronounce foreign names and titles differently because IT IS NOT OUR NATIVE LANGUAGE. On that note... using foreign languages for humor and/or fun is great. Please continue to do that if you are currently doing it. Jikai made, minesan mata ne.

*Spanglish may actually be a good movie, I can't say I have seen it.

Friday, February 03, 2006

i would like to kick Exxon in the privates, etc.

and i would start with Lee Raymond. here we the people are, paying more for gasolina than we ever have in the history of ever, and XOM posts the world record profit number for a corporation. what a brutal shryuuken/hadooooken combo to the face (dont act too cool for that reference, you know what i am talkin about.) i figured someone was gettin some stretchedy pockets from the extra dollars i was putting into the pump, i just didnt figure it would post publicly as a world record. how about a little reduction in the gas price so you only post 9 billion profits for Q4 instead of the nearly 10? a little ball help here? oh, and they arent the only ones, Royal Dutch Shell posted a U.K. profit record in 2005 as well.

thank goodness someone is finally suing Apple for "hearing loss due to ipod". i mean, they should be taken to court and have to pay huge fines to people that they forced their ipod's into the ears of America and turned up the volume to defeaning levels. shame on you Apple. people should have a right to listen to portable music without having to worry about permanent hearing loss and emotional damage. i bet Apple has a vested interest in a few hearing aid companies and are looking for ways to boost hearing aid sales. yeah.

in truth, i hope if this case reaches the courtroom, after hearing the opening arguments, the judge calmly walks over to the prosecutor's table, opens prosecutor's briefcase, births a brown squirrel in aforementioned briefcase, closes it, then goes back to the bench and pounds the gavel. case dismissed.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

flight of the conchords

if the picture alone doesnt convince you, find somewhere to listen to their tunage. they have a video page that has a few videos as well, i am sure you can locate it if you look hard enough. they have been featured on HBO and are going to be at SXSW in austin, tx in march. their musical persiflage is genius. if someone can watch the video of "Hiphopopotamus vs Rhymenocerous" and not crack a smile, then my name isnt Balky Bartakkamoose.

in other news, i got totally busted deploying a stanker cloud this morning circa 850am. ya know, sometimes you are sittin at your desk in the office and let one go due to discomfort avoidance, and immediately afterward someone walks up to your workspace and enters the no fly zone. well, this person knew what i had done, and i kinda gave him the look of confirmation (gotta step up to the plate when its that bad and that obvious) and he left with an "i'll come back later". i issued a public statement something to the effect of...sorry duder, sometimes a wreckin ball has gotta wreck shop. he understood and respected the sincerety. happy thursday kids.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Counting Crows Lyric Study

We here at mikeandtimblog.blogspot.com are big Counting Crows fans. There is a variety of reasons for this, but all in all, they are just good. Good musicians, good lyrics, good live (ask Mike), and good in general.

As a listener to many Crows' songs over the years I have noticed some patterns in the songwriting, more of themes that carry through their songs. I suspect this common with other bands, and instead of finding it distasteful with CC, I think it actually is pretty cool- themes tie the music together.

So, here is a basic count of some of the more frequently used words by Counting Crows (Adam Duritz) over their four studio albums:

Rain: 28 times
America: 23 times
Girl: 58 times
Sleep: 51 times

What does this tell us... that if you're gay man, live in Russia, enjoy sunny days, and hardly ever sleep that the Crows' don't like you? Maybe.... but I still think you should give them a listen. On that note... release another album soon please. Next study: Hanson.

the strokes / state of the union (actual)

short one today folks, this week has been wicked busy at work, and at home really. since sunday night i have read a book called "success God's way" by the dr. charles stanley, reviewed a movie screenplay for a buddy, and have eaten an entire package of oreos.

the new strokes album is great. if you like rock n roll, i suggest you pick you up a copy from your local record store. it has rockin jams, it has good tunage, and it has rockin jams. in other music news, i tossed my rolling stone in the trash upon receipt this week. it has a picture of kanye west with a crown of thorns on his head and it says something about "the passion of kanye". it could have a great article about how kanye is devoted to his faith in God over all else and is a great dude, but i was so repulsified by him wearing a crown of thorns on the cover it went straight to the garbage. i get uncomfortable when people other than Jesus are shown with such things.

i thought the state of the union was decent last night, but was severly distracted by the childish games that the democrats were playing in their seats. it is one thing to agree/disagree with viewpoints and platforms. it is another thing to show immature disrespect. i am pretty sure after they were dismissed from the chamber last night, they went and played truth or dare and snacked on fruit roll ups. "Lieberman's hosting a game of Spin the Bottle in his office! Last one there is a Mr. Fillyfunkels!!"