Wednesday, February 15, 2006

first grade chaos

ever spent a day with 22 first graders?

if you havent, you should. kids this age are totally wild, energetic, and illogical. but they are so sweet and honest that it brings you back to the real world and puts things into perspective. yesterday i took half the day off to go party with my wife's first grade class and it was a great time. we went to the library and the kids were reading their favorite stories to me, we had recess where i got tackled by a dozen kids pulling on my arms and legs, and we had a good old fashioned party at the end of the day. remember the little bags that you decorate and the other kids put valentines in there that you get to open? so much fun. well, it reminded me of when i was in first grade, and a rather traumatic event that took place.


see, there was this girl that i had a massive crush on when i was 6 years old. her name was carrie and she was the hottest babe in the grade. the picture at right is a sketch of what i remember her looking like. as you can see, she was smokin hot. we were together a lot in school. in music class, when we went to recess, etc. i think we only hung out outside of school once or thrice, but things were lookin really good. so i figure, heck, i gotta give her a valentine on valentines day. now, every kid gives every other kid in class a valentine in first grade. boys even give other boys valentines (i verified this yesterday in my wife's class to be sure) and its not like they are goin brokeback on each other, its totally innocent. its just how it is. the valentine i gave carrie was a little better than the ones i gave everyone else. i dont remember details but i remember that much.

it came to be that time of the day where we were to open valentines and i remember the exact second in time when carrie opened the one that i gave her. i heard this "WHAT?? WHAT IS THIS?!?!" she walks over to where i was standing at the time, rips up the valentine in my face (literally) the whole while screaming "I CANT BELIEVE YOU GAVE ME A VALENTINE MIKE!! I CANT BELIEVE YOU! YOU ARE GROSS!" of course all the other kids turn to watch this episode and see this whole disaster unfold. she then wads up whatever ripped up portion of the valentine that hasnt fallen on the floor, slams it in the trash can which is right next to us, and then winds up and SLAPS ME as hard as one first grader can slap another. i wont lie, it hurt.

as you can imagine, this was an experience to remember. it really is a wonder that i ever gave another girl a valentine. i am pretty sure the only other time i have been slapped was by andTim's mom i think, but that was more to the head than the face. plus thats only because i did or said something that deserved it and she was doing me a favor.

any of you have simliar valentines heartbreak or story? lets hear them if you do.

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