Thursday, February 23, 2006

just swappin out a battery, right?

thats what i thought anyway. i have a 2002 chevy tahoe which has earned the nickname of "Bitch Ass 'Hoe" over the course of nearly 4 years of ownership. it first received aforementioned nickname after the engine failed, which i consider a good reason. in all honesty, i love the Bitch Ass, but this morning it reminded me of how it got its well deserved nickname.

last night my wife comes home and the truck was starting to malfunction. not while she was driving though, it was at least considerate enough to wait till she got home, which i cant complain about. it has been having some starting issues but it always turns over, and plus its frickin freezin mr. bigglesworth in the mornings where i live. cold enough that it would be beneficial to have insta-heater in the car (andTim should get to work on developing this) and it is acceptable for a truck to have a slight struggle before starting in these conditions. well, last night the battery went down. i was getting a few things out of the truck when the interior lights dimmed and the tone of the "hey jackass, your doors are open and your keys are still in the ignition" bell was headed to chinatown. DING DIng diooionng. pttttffftttp. so i figure, no big deal, i will run to walmart and grab a battery, let my wife take the other car to work, and i will install battery in the morning and take the truck. going to walmart anytime after 11pm is always a bit unstable to me for some reason, its just weird in there. so i proceed with the plan, buy the battery and figure its too darn late, cold, and dark to attempt this installation at midnight, so i go to bed.

i got up this morning and attempt to remove old battery. the toughest part of this operation is to find the right size socket, its not hard. well, i got the negative lead cable off with no problem (thats the black cable for you laypeoples) and then went to unscrew the positive cable. the side connector thingy was pretty corroded, but i got out a brush and some coke and cleaned it up a bit. as i turn the socket wrench to unscrew it, the whole connector pops off, including the threading and plastic from the old battery. this connector is about the diameter of a golf ball and it pulled off about an inch of battery plastic with it. is mike that strong to rip a hole in the battery? perhaps. but this time it was caused by such intense battery acid leakage that the plastic had melted to the battery cable and connector. not good. this prevents installation of new battery, which prevents truck from starting, which prevents getting to work. BITCH ASS 'HOE strikes again.

thank goodness my good friend James saves the day by taking the morning off so he can come over, cut battery cables with wire cutter, prep area, let me take his car to the AutoZone (that store is no good by the way, go to O'Reilly) and get the necessary parts. James helped me get it all handled and then we put the new battery in, of which i am very thankful. thanks buddy, you are bigtime. and so i finally go to work circa 11:45am, just in time to head to lunch with the crew. nice.


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