Friday, September 30, 2005

it is the Stros year / bunny commando

if you dont think its the Stros year, your reading privileges for this blog have been suspended for one week. yeah thats right, i just grounded you. all you crazy readers out there, yeah you, there must be at least a billion of you...dont come back till October 7th if you do not believe in the Stros. the Stros will get to and win the World Series. get on board the wagon of truth.

in other news and notes, i chased a bunny rabbit for about 1/8 mile last night in an attempt to scare the little bastards out of my yard. see, where i live there are bunny rabbits instead of squirrels. where i grew up, there were ganders of suicidal squirrels that would play a continuous game of frogger on the roads due to overpopulation and pier pressure tests of bravery*. now you would think my front yard is a giant lettuce patch in which the bunnies want to live in my hedges and munch down on my yard. they have roosted in the dying bush nearest to my front door and i have now implemented the "shock and awe those rabbit bitches" tactical operation. every time i water my lawn i first put on my college lacrosse cleats, then i get out the high pressure hose attachment valve and spray directly at the rabbit bitch roost. upon "bunny exodus", i drop the hose and sprint after the rabbits. i have no chance of catching them, nor do i want to hurt them**, but i just want to chase them out of my yard. perhaps due to high daily stress imposition i will force them to go live somewhere else. they are killing the grass and the "shock and awe" is more than necessary. it is mandatory and i will prevail.

* speculatory comment - i have yet to survey the squirrels, but i will.
** may or may not be a true statement


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