mikeandtim

enough with the Noni

on my way to work this morning i saw three cars with giant magnets advertising Noni juice on them. i see these things all the time. in fact, there are two vehicles in our parking lot at work that have such magnets on them. this Noni must be the most amazing stuff on the planet. does it increase the size of your genitalia or something? i am more than half serious with that question. what is so great about the Noni? what is the Noni? is it a fruit? veggie? some form of elixir made from the one and only known Noni plant located in a cave by a waterfall in Tahiti? this better be some good stuff for all this advertisement.

what about these people that promote the Noni? why put a magnet on your car? perhaps the Noni is a sponsor for some kind of sports team that you are cheering for, like the Tahitian Noni Juice Goblins soccer club? i am pretty sure these Noni magnet people do not get any commission for the Noni sales, or i am guessing not, because there is an 800 number on the Noni magnet to call if you want to buy the Noni. surely they cannot track down Noni sales due to people seeing your Noni car magnet, then dialing on their cell phone while driving thinking to themselves "man, i gotta get me some of that Noni!" or do they? does the Noni even exist? perhaps it is some kind of secret club and they identify themselves under the cover of Noni. then, if you call the 800 number, some deep scary monster just fears you into buying Noni. so many speculations regarding the Noni. what would be really funny is if people just buy the Noni magnets as a prank, then just put them on random cars in parking lots. i would go for that.

i may have to go buy a bottle of Noni at the store and try it, just to know what all this hype is about. thats it! thats the scam! all these advertisers just so every person ends up buying one bottle of Noni to see what the hype is about, thus increasing sales on something that probably gives you explosive rhea circa 90 seconds after drinking. no thanks. i wont have it. anti-Noni. no Noni. sans Noni.

posted by mikeandtim @ 8:21:00 AM